Planet of the Week: Uranus

This week’s planet is likely the last Planet of the Week. Seems I’ve run out of planets from my local system, though one day I might cover planets from other systems. Don’t go thinking I would have covered Pluto if scientists had decided to keep calling it a planet, I always maintained that it was not.

This week we honour Uranus, that great blue sphere. Uranus can be seen here rolling its eyes at all the stupid jokes made about its name. Uranus doesn’t much care for socializing.

Planet of the Week: Saturn

Saturn is the Planet of the Week. Saturn is most famous for its rings, which is why I’ve embellished on them in the image. It seems like a lot of ill conceived cartoons, as well as many fantasies, including those of Frank Sinatra, involve walking on the rings of Saturn, which is why some poor idiot can be seen above, suffocating.

Planet of the Week: Venus

Venus is named for the Roman goddess of love, a name I find particularly fitting. You see, Venus’ atmosphere is a toxic doom of carbon dioxide, resulting in deadly hot surface temperatures. Pictured above, Venus can be seen holding in its toxic shame of womanhood.

Planet of the Week: Neptune

The Planet of the Week is Neptune. Neptune can be seen here sad as hell, being the planet furthest from the sun, and very much alone. He was celebrating a few days ago when his nemesis Pluto finally got kicked out of the planetary club, but now Neptune wonders if anybody will bother visiting him anymore without his idiot neighbour around.

Planet of the Week: Mercury

The Planet of the Week is Mercury. Mercury recently became the smallest of the now eight planets in the Sol system. It can be seen above utterly dwarfed by the nearby sun. In Sailor Moon, Sailor Mercury is the greatest and hottest of the Sailor Scouts due to her super hyper omega genius.