Creature of the Week: The Talented Ortolan

Source: This Creature of the Week is the talented Ortolan, a pachydermoid race in the Star Wars universe. One of the most famous Ortolan is Max Rebo, who played in a band at Jabba the Hutt’s palace until being freed by a returning Jedi. I’m ignoring it, but apparently, events in the Star Wars universe should be described in the past tense, at least, that’s the way Wookieepedia does it. That makes sense, considering these things happened “a long time ago.”

Depicted Above: Ortolans look like damn elephants. Blue, muppet-like elephants. Some may accuse me of being a repugnant, sex obsessed pervert, but come on, these guys have pretty phallic trunks.

Vital Statistics: Homeworld: Orto. Average height: 1.4-1.8 meters. Distinctions: Stocky, large ears, long snouts.

Fury Factor: If Max Rebo can have a solo career after his stay at Jabba’s palace, you know these pachydermoids must be tough. Fury Factor: 12.5.