Square Enix attempts to mask shame, making Final Fantasy XIII-2

Image: Final Fantasy XIII-2 logo. Square Enix.

No one can forget (although many would like to) Final Fantasy X‘s sequel, Final Fantasy X-2. That was done, presumably, to fill the gap between X and XII for those not interested in XI, which was an MMO.

SE is repeating the pattern described above for the current generation of Final Fantasies, with Final Fantasy XIII-2 now announced. Similar to the PS2 era, this is presumably being done to cover up that awkward gap between XIII and XV known as “Final Fantasy XIV;” or, “the shitty MMO Square just released.

Not much is known about the game at this point, except that head members from XIII‘s development will be back. “Lightning,” who was apparently the main character will also be down for XIII-2. No word on a work-around for pronouncing the ugly game title has been announced.

This still doesn’t explain what Final Fantasy Type-0 is.

Source: IGN

Square Enix trademarks “Final Fantasy Type-0,” “Type-1,” etc.

This hardly seems final.

What deviousness is Square Enix up to? Trademarks for “Final Fantasy Type-0,” “Type-1,” “Type-2,” and “Type-3″ have popped up in Europe’s trademark database.

Another spin-off, further diluting the Final Fantasy brand, perhaps? Or maybe the company believes Final Fantasy XIV is far enough, and will be starting back at “Type-1″ now. I know, it’s got to be a hard-core reboot of the Final Fantasy series. Each one a blood, aliens, guns, and excessive use of the word “fuck” remake of its numerically corresponding original.

Yeah, I actually have no idea, and I probably never will, either. That is, until the company holds a press conference next month, presumably to explain this.

Sources: NeoGAF, GoNintendo

Square-Enix low on Gil for 2010

Image: Adapted from Hughes, Vincent Valentine, Tifa?, and Cloud? Cosplay by pockybum522 under a CC-BY license.

The company that once brought you quality entertainment like levitating triangular hair and Tifa’s bouncing breasts has fallen on hard times.

Following the delays of Deus Ex: Human Revolution and the PS3 version of Final Fantasy XIV, Square-Enix has been forced hack, slash, and maim its annual net profit forecast by over 90%. The company now expects to make a mere $11.9 million this year, compared with its previously predicted $142.8 million.

Those delays aren’t SE’s only problems this year. The company blames “weak sales performance of console game titles that have been newly released during the current fiscal year as well as harsh market feedback regarding a key title.” That key title being, of course, Final Fantasy XIV. The game’s PC version has seen repeated extensions of its free subscription period due to ongoing complaints from loyal Moogle worshipers.

The house that teen angst and overwrought cut-scenes built may still be able to redeem itself. Analysts such as those who frequent message boards and comment sections on the internet have been quick to point out that all the company needs to do is remake Final Fantasy VII for [insert most honourable choice for game console here].

Source: Gamasutra

Neckbeard & Wolfshirt: The SEGA Years, Part 3

Final Fantasy XI: Level Cap 99

In a last ditch effort to make FFXI exciting again (before FFXIV steals all the players away), SE has decided to increase the level cap of PCs from 75 all the way to ninety-fucking-nine. Unpossible. Generally caps have been increased in increments of 5, the last cap happening years and years ago.

Undoubtedly there will be a thrilling level cap quest (an angst-inducing chain most likely) to unlock the last 24 levels of the game. I’m guessing that this time the cap quest will have nothing to do with the previous uncapper of levels, Matt, and more to do with the new higher level area, Abyssea.

Remember when Square-Enix announced 75 cap, and we all wondered if they could announce level 80 cap without breaking the game? How will this effect sub-jobs and endgame? But most importantly, let’s remember: getting to 75 in FFXI was no walk through Azeroth. It takes some damn time. Does SE really think that more than a handful of people will be dedicated enough to make the long grind when the new FF MMO is just around the corner?