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(Obvious) Shameful Human of the Week: Mel Gibson

I hate to be this obvious, but the Shameful Human of the Week is American/Australian actor, director, racist, anti-Semite, and sexist Mel “Blow Me First” Gibson.

The world first became aware of Mel’s anger issues in 2006 when he was arrested for driving under the influence. It was during his arrest then that he claimed that Jews were “responsible for all the wars in the world.” Well, it turns out that that little tirade was just the beginning.

Now Mel’s being investigated for domestic violence against former girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva, and some secret force in the universe is releasing clips of the insane rant conversations he had with her to the media. Thanks to these recordings, the world has now learned that Mel feels Oksana’s breast implants put her at risk for gang rape at the hands of a racial minority. Did you also know that Mel once had an urgent sexual need to be “blown fast… before the fucking Jacuzzi”? The situation was so dire that it needed to be performed before he burned down his house.

Yeah, Mel’s apparently a pretty scary guy to date. I’m sure that in the days and weeks to come, we’ll hear plenty more about wacky Mel, but he’s already made it entirely clear that he deserves the title Shameful Human of the Week. Then again, his movies pretty much did that already.

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Shameful Human of the Week: Prince

Prince

Image: By Micah Goldstein. under a CC-BY license.

I’ve got a shocking story for you. The internet, you know, that whole thing, well it’s over. In fact, according to Prince, better known as The Artist Formerly Known as Prince, it’s “completely over.”

In an interview with the Daily Mirror, the world’s most famous lover of purple has announced he wants “as many people as possible to hear his music.” He is conveniently giving away his new album in CD form through that paper. Citizens of the UK and Ireland won’t be able to get his new music anywhere else: 20TEN won’t be sold in stores, and certainly not online. Prince had his website shut down, so potential fans won’t be able to check out his songs there, either.

There’s a pretty simple explanation for all of this. Prince has come to the realization that the internet is no longer cool, and wants to avoid associating himself with it. In the same interview mentioned previously, Prince compared the internet to MTV, stating “at one time MTV was hip and suddenly it became outdated.” TAFKAP also pointed out the very real dangers of the internet, noting “Anyway, all these computers and digital gadgets are no good. They just fill your head with numbers and that can’t be good for you.”

The worst thing of all about the internet? Well, those online music stores like iTunes, they don’t pay in advance. And so, Prince says, “I don’t see why I should give my new music [to them].”

Prince’s new, and very ironically titled, album 20TEN will be mailed out along with copies of newspapers July 10 in the UK and Irelnd. Have fun listening to this Shameful Human’s brand new music.

Editor’s note: This image is used under a creative commons license. Prince isn’t going to come after me… I think. He’s gone after fansites for artwork before in trying to “reclaim the internet.”

Shameful Human(s) of the Week: Nintendo Co., Ltd.

This week’s Shameful Human is actually an entire corporation of people, it’s Nintendo Co., Ltd. In its arrogance, this once great company has done the unthinkable, and actually spoken ill of its competition.

Sony’s Worldwide Studios president Shuhei Yoshida found Nintendo’s words at E3 2010 to be hurtful. Frequently reminding consumers that their new 3DS handheld device allows users to play games in 3D without glasses is simply too much. Yoshida feels the company shouldn’t “bash some small part of what the other company is doing,” referring to his own company’s with-glasses 3D tech.

Sony just wants to play nice, after all. Yoshida would like to “work alongside Nintendo in promoting the new technology.” Pointing out how unfairly Nintendo treats 3D glasses, he also notes that they are “light and you kind of forget you’re wearing them after awhile.”

It’s about time someone stood up to Nintendo and their over-the-top trash talking. It’s embarrassing, and, frankly, unprofessional. Sony has shown nothing but kindness to Nintendo in every regard, betraying the company, stealing their tech, and entering the gaming industry as a direct competitor was a compliment in the highest regard.

Of course, its unlikely a company as reprehensible as Nintendo would actually do right and work with Sony. The company appears to be pitifully obsessed with minor misspeakings over the years from Sony personnel who have repeatedly implied that Nintendo products are gimmicky and kiddy.

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Shameful Human of the Week: Andrew Auernheimer

Andrew Auernheimer, or Weev as he’s known online, is a crazy person. He was once profiled by the New York Times as part of a piece on 4chan’s finest. Auernheimer might, just might, hates Jews and the Federal Reserve. He is also possibly excited by the thought of mass-extermination as a solution for overpopulation. At the very least, he pretends to journalists to be a mega-rich hacker. There’s plenty there to qualify as Shameful Human of the Week.

Now this professional troll and neckbeard aficionado has landed himself in jail for drug possession. Conveniently enough, Weev was kinda-probably under investigation by the FBI following that iPad security breach you may have heard about recently.

Andrew, of Goatse Security (yup), played a vital role in uncovering an AT&T security issue which allowed iPad owners’ email addresses to be exposed.

I can’t help but wonder if this professional troll got a little too into character. It’s one thing to torture members of LiveJournal, and quite another to fuck with major corporations while under the influence of illicit substances. Maybe this is all part of the plan, and Weev did all of this to get his ugly face plastered all over the internet as punishment to the rest of us. In any case, I wish him luck trolling his fellow prisoners.

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Shameful Human of the Week: Ray Maguire

E3 fast approaches, and the gaming world stands poised for war with Sony and Nintendo positioning themselves for epic combat. It’s going to be a transcendent 3D handheld taking on a bumbling and bloated 3D console, and it’s a wonderful opportunity for Sony execs to say incredibly foolish things. Shufflingdead is sincerely grateful.

Sony’s UK Managing Director recently met up with Eurogamer to talk about his company’s sad attempt at profitability, and for that, the man has earned himself the title Shameful Human of the Week. Congratulations, Mr. Ray Maguire.

Maguire was asked about his console’s “over-specced technology,” and its appeal to the masses. Ray rightly responded that lower console prices had “worked particularly well for one of our competitors.” He then ceased to make sense. Maguire claimed Nintendo had appealed to a “potentially smaller market” with the DS and Wii. He went on to brag about the 3.5 million PS3s his company has sold in the UK, neglecting to mention that Nintendo has moved twice as many Wiis in the region.

Maguire’s sad mathematical methodology is laughable even for PR spin. In what conceivable realm does selling a product at a lower price point limit the breadth of its market? I suppose opposite math is de rigueur for Sony employees, considering Mr. Maguire’s buddy Andrew House, SCE Europe’s President, recently explained the PSPgo disaster as an experiment in consumer interest.

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