shufflingdead.com

I’ve written before about creating a successful website, but this is 2009, and things have changes. GeoCities will soon be closed, the first result of seemingly every search is to a Wikipedia article, and people actually make money uploading their content to other people’s websites. This is the era of getting big on big sites, and using that fame to trick people into visiting your website.

→ Continue reading Creating a Popular Website

I know what you’re doing. Even if I haven’t actually talked to you in a decade, I know the details of your life, because you let me know on Facebook. I see you, in your relationships, going on your trips, having, unbelievably, your weddings, and even reproducing.

→ Continue reading I See You

I. The Usual

Part 1: If you break one of these rules you’re probably going to get banned:
1. Don’t post copyrighted material or give people instructions on how to illegally access copyrighted material. This includes mp3s, porn, ROMs, etc.
2. If you’re going to post an image, sound clip, or video that is offensive, pornographic, or disgusting, do so only as a link, and make sure you label it clearly as “NSFW” or something. In other words, don’t post anything that is going to get a person strange looks or fired just for browsing the forums.
3. Do not make any non-sarcastic threats against anyone, especially other members of the forums.
4. Don’t post other people’s personal information, including address, phone number, email address, or other contact information without their consent.
5. Don’t post ads. Yes, you can pimp your LiveJournal or latest artistic endeavor, just make sure you’re a real person first, and that you’re here for a reason other than to make money.

→ Continue reading The Hyper-Omega-Giga-Gantrithor Forums Rules Megalopolis

I started out on the internet a little later than a lot of nerds. I never had dial-up, never experiences BBSes, and I never did much with chat rooms. Still, it was 2001 when I got the internet, and that feels like a long time ago now. Back then, we had something called ICQ, I used it to waste time with my friends and harass the girls I went to high school with. My early experiences with the internet very much sprang from ICQ, it was where a friend told me you could get free hosting for your own website at a place called Angelfire, and it was over ICQ that many of the interactions which I discussed and parodied on that Angelfire site (which eventually became this site) came from.

→ Continue reading View Message History

I wrote this article several months ago. It likely no longer makes any sense. Then again, Rick Astley could still be voted best act ever.

The internet has always been a butcher shop for the English language, but it seems to be getting worse. The problem is that while misspellings, misuse, bad grammar, and intentional, ironic bad grammar, were once relegated to sites I stayed away from, it’s now seeping into the sites I actually visit.
→ Continue reading Internet Grammar Getting Worse

This site has an odd way of being fucked by its hosts, our dealings with Angelfire, for example, have passed into legend. Still, the means by which we have been fucked, and the degree to which we have been fucked by our last host, Page-Zone.com, are astonishing. I have asked my old host-reviewing friends back to help me out with this article. Enya, Jewel, and Maren Ord will be reading some comments made by other Page-Zone users, with their own expletives added in for clarification.

→ Continue reading Review: Page-Zone.com

Every year, Time magazine, or maybe it’s Time.com, I can’t really tell, puts together a list of the “50 coolest websites.” This year, being the first year I’ve noticed, has filled me with great annoyance as the selections are largely illogical and commonly unheard of. My research thus far leads me to believe that the list is only put together so that Time has an excuse to use words like “blog,” “vlog,” and “web 2.0.” I endeavor to dissect this list for my writing pleasure and your reading pleasure.

→ Continue reading Time’s 50 Coolest Websites 2006

The internet provides a human being with everything he could ever want. Free porn, free music, free movies. Requiring something tangible? There is an unfathomable number of sites out there where you can order absolutely anything your heart desires and have it delivered strait to your doorstep. Probably the trickiest desire to quench though is the undeniable urge to pick some kind of satire/humor site containing a huge community and visit it hourly. I am here to make your decision easier and review some of the largest such sites.

→ Continue reading Satire/Humors Sites With Massive Communities Reviewed!

Every huckfuck on the internet is obsessed with creating a single type of website; a blog. You know the phenomenon is serious when there are as many of them out there as “Lolita prego-fur lactating camel” sites. Things have really become horrendously overcrowded, especially with the advent of such madness as “LiveJournal.” Being a man who has spent the last three years attempting and repeatedly failing to make just one site popular, I know exactly what it takes.

→ Continue reading Making a Popular Blog