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The Gym Problem

August 27, 2009 Society No Comments

One of my goals this summer was to “get in good enough shape to fuck with impunity.” By that, I meant “get in good enough shape to be a glistening wall of muscle, so toned that no lady could resist.” Most people have, in their lives, gotten exercise: when they were kids they were a part of some after school activity like soccer or karate, when they were teenagers, they acted out through hoodlum-ish behaviour requiring physical strength, when they hit adulthood, they participated in guilt-induced bouts of jogging and weight lifting, and throughout all of this, rode their bikes. Not so, for me. Previous to this summer, my only exercise experience came from the odd walk, clumsy nerd basketball, and that one summer when I jumped rope.

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The Future of Gaming

August 20, 2009 Games No Comments

As an avid console gamer, I like to keep up on what the future holds for my favourite industry. I’ve compiled several ideas, all very real, which console makers have recently patented, and I would like to use this article to ruminate on the possibilities of each of these innovations.

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I See You

August 6, 2009 Technology No Comments

I know what you’re doing. Even if I haven’t actually talked to you in a decade, I know the details of your life, because you let me know on Facebook. I see you, in your relationships, going on your trips, having, unbelievably, your weddings, and even reproducing.

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For the Gentlemen: Successful Internet Dating

July 20, 2009 Dating No Comments

If you’re like me, you’re probably miserable and alone. As with all things in life, the internet offers a plethora of easy solutions for finding the perfect girlfriend/fuck-buddy/platonic-wank-buddy to solve this. As someone who has recently taken to trawling Craigslist for hot local singles and attempted to seduce women via a free online dating site, I feel qualified to help you get started in finding your perfect match. This article will detail my suggestions to men to help them succeed in online dating.

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Video Game Character Analysis: Females

July 13, 2009 Games No Comments

Last week, I wrote an article analyzing some of the grizzled bad-ass men of gaming, this week I’d like to check out the finely sculpted female equivalents.

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