Brannigan 2008 Speech and Song

Each year at my birthday, known as The Brannigan, I perform a special speech and song. These are the speech and song from Brannigan 2008.

Welcome to Brannigan 2008, Brannigan 5. The finest Brannigan that there has ever been.

It’s now time for the annual speech and song. This year it’s actually a speech followed by a poem.

Speech:

Welcome! Welcome to a new year at Brannigan!
Before we begin our banquet, I would like to say a few words. And here they are:
Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!
Thank you!

Poem:

This poem is dedicated to a fine young lady who I know. Don’t worry, she gave me permission to do this.

This poem is called “My precious”

In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit.
DMUSER has a Magic card named Grim-Poppet.
Monopoly is my game, not into Bop-it.
You always turn me down, sure wish you would stop it.

At Brannigan last, one long year ago today.
If I recall, my love for you I did convey.
On our dates I would split the pay.
I’m just really really cheap that way.

And now it’s time for a refrain.
How I honour that John McClain.
Zoolander, film with Billy Zane.
Nothing lasts forever, even cold November rain.

I do enjoy it when we fight.
While my views are always right.
And yours certainly a little light.
I still think you’re lookin’ tight.

Last time I wrote a poem for a girl.
She never let me give her a necklace pearl.
But she did date me for a whirl.
How ‘bout it woman, even though I make you hurl?

Thank you.