Pretty Vaginal
Dear Samus as Depicted by REIQ,
Samus, I’ve been staring at you in this particular piece of artwork for many years, and so has much of the internet. It’s just that you are so preposterously busty in this image that I am mesmerized. Shapely doesn’t begin to describe your rack in this picture.
When I take the improbable leap of looking away from your chest for just a moment, though, I see evidence that you have escaped the bonds of gravity and even the human need for atmosphere. Could it be, Samus, that this portrait is a delusion of fantasy and not true to your experiences as a bounty hunter?
I was also wondering, since it comes up in this image as well as places in your games, where does that pistol of yours come from when you bust out of your suit? Is it just sitting in your arm cannon, waiting for the moment that your suit flies off, so that you can immediately start blasting space pirates?
Please Samus, come visit me in your Zero Suit as soon as possible so that we may clear up these issues.
Grapple Beam me any time,
Newbs
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